Summer fun.....summer hassles....

It is that time of year again.
Parents of young children watch the weather, and wait for "pool days" to come to suburbia. The minute the temperature hits 75 degrees we all grab the pool bag and head out for summer fun.
Our community pool is the scene that movies about the suburbs are made of. It is a textbook. Every couple from the neighborhood, the preschool, the grocery store, and the PTA are suddenly prancing around half naked, their bodies pale from the long winter.
Truth is...normal middle aged people look better with their clothes on.
The only "hot" factor going on was the rising temperature on the outdoor thermometer.

South Beach....it ain't.

The usual gossip trickles around the shallow end when certain people arrive. The dads let it all hang out, not really aware of the their guts, or caring for that matter. They are completely oblivious to the gossip....except when she struts by them.
The moms, however, care.
Most of us run for our cover up any time we have to move from one chair to the next, go to the restroom, or buy something at the concession stand. No woman I know really feels comfortable strutting around the pool in all of her "baby making" body glory, letting it all hang out.
It is at these precise moments that I long for the body I had when I was single. Before gravity met me and my children took up house in my uterus. Before my hips moved three inches out in both directions to accomodate my new priorities.

Before I thought of a skirted bathing suit bottom as "cute".

The amount of strategy necessary for the day at the pool wears me out. I am tired before I even get in the water.
First you must find a suit that fits you. (this isn't rocket science.... it is way worse.)
You must shave or wax all of your hairy bits. (which often means a shower in the a.m. and another when you get home)
Then you must get a cover up that is both cute, and functional.
You must pack the bag with sunscreen, pool passes and pool toys, snacks and towels and money.
And if you happen to have your period on the perfect pool day....well then, you are totally screwed.

My kids, of course, notice none of this prep work. They gallop around in all their glory, oblivious to the concerns of middle aged spread. They have no cares in the world. It is as it should be.

Ahhh.....to be young again.

I am thinking that the idea of a backyard pool might not be so crazy after all.